Chew On This

This section may often feature fictional stories, opinion pieces, poetry and other creative written or visual works. The artists and writers in this section are free to provide their thoughts and visions for the purposes of entertainment and/or invoking free thought. As such, these works may not always necissarily reflect the opinions and beliefs of Brownscape Productions.

The Devil is Alive and Well....and took me on my Road Test

Anna Paul

It was the night before the road test and all through the house not a
creature was stirring - except Chippy that is. Chippy was in the
bathroom barfing her brains out, every hour she would wake up with the feeling of nausea in her stomach. People awed and gave her looks of sympathy: "poor Chippy, so nervous that she threw up."

"Nay" Chippy cried, "tis not nervousness but plainly a deceitful plan!"
She glanced about the room and said, "Someone here has stirred a wicked, wicked plan. Food poison me before my road test will you? Plan to crush me so that I would never take my road test ay? Well guess what? You're wrong! I will take my test in my weakened condition and pass!" With a gust of wind Chippy went out the door and to the road test area, where she met one of the more evil people in the world.

She was an unusually large women dressed in the darkest of clothes. She carried a clip board with her where she had slashed off the names of the poor children who failed - as the grim reaper would do when finished a days work. She got into the car and turned to poor Chippy and hissed the word "drive." Up and down the road, right, left, "I said LEFT!" Chippy made a deadly mistake: she turned right instead of left, she could feel her life points slowly draining away.

Now for the moment of truth, parallel parking. Blinker on, look around, car in reverse, turn wheel, back up, stop, car in drive, straighten wheel, move forward, stop. The women dressed in dark gave a grunt and in distaste told Chippy to make a U-turn. "A U-turn?" Chippy mumbled. Never before was she asked to make a U-turn, but she hesitated only a moment and did as the women asked. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Boomed the women in dark, "U-turns are ILLEGAL!" Chippy's face turned white "but ma'am you
asked me to make a U-turn, did you by chance mean for me to make a three point turn?" The angry women in dark only stared at Chippy for a while before asking her to drive back to the road test building.

A moment of fear and nervousness was upon Chippy. Oh did she pass? Did she fail? Did the menace who food poisoned her win? Was she too to be another name slashed off the list? The suspense was killing her! (and you too). With a heavy sigh the women in dark scribbled her signature onto the paper and said "in 4 to 6 weeks your license will come in the mail. You passed." Chippy screamed with joy! She had passed! The odds were against her but they were no matter! She had passed. -anna@brownscapeprod.com